Aster

Daily Routine

There's no fixed schedule, so she fits with your day. The rough routine looks like this:

Morning

Usually no rush to get outside. She chills on the bed while you get ready. Head out for the first toilet walk whenever you're good to go Try to avoid going out between 8–8:30am if you can, as that's apparently dog rush hour on the streets

Breakfast when you get back from the first walk.

Midday

After breakfast she'll usually sleep or entertain herself for a good few hours. When she starts getting antsy (~around noon or 1pm depending on when you started the day) that's the cue for a second walk sometime soon

Afternoon / Early Evening

Another outing before dinner, then dinner when you're back. She winds down naturally in the evening, so she'll be pretty snoozy after that

Last Toilet Trip

Whenever suits you really - if we go out at ~9pm, she's good till morning (so later is also fine ofc)

Bedtime

Once you're in bed and under the covers, that's usually the cue she takes to move from her current spot and jump up on the bed to snuggle. If you'd rather she's not in the bed, point her to the crate before you get into bed. She may be slow if she's very sleepy and comfy, but stand your ground - just say it once and keep pointing at it - she'll eventually go. Then just close her in gentle & cover.

Feeding

I screwed up timing of Butternut Box, so for this weekend I've pre-portioned individual tubs of rice, chicken, and carrots which she does love. Each container is one meal ready to serve, so no measuring needed, and the probiotic powder is already mixed in.

Serve it in her slow feeder bowl. I usually rinse it when she's done breakfast, use again for dinner, then wash thoroughly for the morning (or dishwasher if you're running it overnight)

The feeding routine

1. When you're preparing her food, say "in your crate!" She'll know food is coming and should head to her crate. If she doesn't go immediately, just pause and look at her... the hard stare really works 😬. Don't continue until she's in.
2. If she pops back out while you're dishing up, stop, and make more eye contact — she knows to go straight back in without you having to repeat yourself.
3. Bring the bowl over to her, and she's usually pretty chill until you lay it down. She should tuck in after that, no release word needed.

Walks

Before you leave the apartment

1. Put her collar on inside, load your pockets/bag with treats.
2. At the front door: go as if to open it, but hesitate before you do, and look at her — she knows to sit while you open it and not run straight out🤞. Say "wait", then get your shoes and jacket on etc.
3. When you say "okay", she'll run out. Occasionally she hesitates at the top of the stairs. In that case you can encourage her with "you go" and she'll work up to it.
4. At the bottom: clip her lead on, and she should automatically sit nicely before you open the door. Say "wait" then open it and peek outside. If a dog or person is about to pass, wait inside until they're gone. It avoids amping her up from the outset - starting the walk calm makes the rest of it so much easier!

On the walk

Her natural pace is a fast little trot — I try to match her pace rather than hold her back if I can. She doesn't intentionally pull; it's usually just a pace mismatch, or when she's determined to leave an area. She doesn't need a specific route though so if there's a direction she wants to go and you don't mind, you can let her lead. Sniffing is basically her only real freedom right now, so I let her take her time.

Other dogs

If you see a dog:

1. Ideally just cross the road — this is always the first move and it works every time. She might be locked in on the dog to begin with, but she actually seems to like the crossing plan once get her attention and start moving.
2. If you can't cross: try to get her focus before before she locks onto the dog: say "are you watching?" or "look!" to get her eyes on you. The moment she looks at you, give her a "yes!" and treat.
3. If the dog is far enough away and she seems locked in and can't focus on you, she does usually eventually choose to turn and move away — she doesn't actually want to engage. Just give her a sec and keep keep gently moving, and she'll come.
4. But if she freezes or lies down and the dog gets closer, just get her moving even with a little tug and speaking to her. I'm trying to avoid her letting her practice the lying-down-while-dog-approaches thing as I recently learned it's anti-social/mimics stalking behaviour that the other dog can feel threatened by 🫠

Other people

Try not to let strangers pet her. She's often trying to get to people, but I noticed recently her hackles can go up when they actually touch her — she doesn't love it even if she seems like she wants it. Just a friendly "she's in training, sorry!" does the job.

impromptu awooooooh

She sometimes does a loud yowwwwwl as we walk past a person... not a bark, just a big emotional noise. It seems to be her new alternative to the moments she used to automatically jump up. Basically she's having big feelings, but not gonna actually do anything. If you see her locking onto someone approaching (tail starting to wag, fixed gaze), you can try to get her attention before it happens. If it does happen: do nothing, try not to react and just keep walking. Any added energy definitely amps her up more 🫨 Some people laugh when she does it and some get a surprise lol. I initially got embarrassed and tried to laugh it off or explain, but now I just keep walking like it's nothing.

If she plants and won't move

Sometimes on days when her cup is already a bit full, she overthinks certain parts of the walk and doesnt want to go further

First, try just getting down to her level and engage without too much fuss — a high five or asking her to "touch" (hold old your hand and she comes over to nudge it with her nose) can reset her. If that's not working:

Toileting on walks

She always poops on the first morning walk. Midday and afternoon walks — she'll always pee, but don't stress if there's no poop. She can take a while to pick her spot. Once she starts doing fast back-and-forth circles, it's coming — you just don't know exactly when. Let her circle.

Rainy walks

If it's raining she'll probably be more hesitant to go out the door downstairs. Use some commands like "touch" or "are you watching?" to get her moving out the door.

Reading Aster

Why she's pestering you

• Sitting close and pawing at you, but not really "present" — seems distracted or in her head Something's made her uneasy and she just wants to be near you or seek comfort. She likes chest rubs here, and try to get her to lie down next to you to chill, or distract her with a game. Don't make a big deal of it.
• Pawing slightly more obsessively and staring directly at you Wants attention or play. You can ignore it if it's not a good time — she'll eventually either sigh and nap, go get a toy and push it at you (that one's hard to resist), or just go entertain herself.
• Pawing which turns into whining, pacing, slightly frantic, not giving up Toilet time. If you try to ignore her attempts. there's an urgency to it that's different. If she goes and sits by the door or stares at you from the rug at the end of the bed (why here, i do not know 🤷‍♀️), that's her "I'm serious" signal. Take her out as soon as you can 🙏
• Sitting in or near her crate and booping the door to make a noise Hungry. Shouldn't happen if meals are on schedule, but just in case.

If you're working at the table

She's not totally used to that setup yet as I was always a couch gal till recently. You can pull out the other chair, put her blanket on it, and tell her to hop up. She might sit there staring at you/being annoying for a while longer, or be up and down a few times, but if you ignore her she will likely curl up and sleep there 🥹

Hackles

Worth knowing once so you recognise it: hackles are the hairs that stand up along her spine and shoulders, like a little ridge. I've been noticing it more recently, and it means she's not comfortable, regardless of what the rest of her body is doing. You might see it with unknown dogs or strangers who try to pet her.

Leaving Her Alone

She's genuinely fine alone — no real separation anxiety. Just do a quick toilet walk first if it's been a while.

Before you leave

1. Shut the bathroom door. Do a quick scan for anything chewable left lying around (shoes, slippers etc.) — she hasn't destroyed anything in ages, but old habits.
2. Get her something to do: a yak chew, her Kong from the freezer, or scatter treats on her sniffy mat.
3. Have it ready, then finish getting your own things together with it still waiting. Once you're ready to go, give it to her, and while she's busy with it, just slip out quietly. No big goodbye.

For short trips (grocery run etc.) — the music and curtains aren't necessary. Just distract and go.

When you come back

1. Crack the door open slightly, and she'll be right there. Say "in your crate!" before you fully open it. She'll whimper to let you know she doesn't love that plan, but she'll race to her crate.
2. Then you can come inside, and tell her "wait" in the crate. Put your stuff down, get sorted, try to ignore the excitement - if she races out again STATUE TIME till she calms down, then another "in your crate!"
3. Once she's calm and you're ready, go over and give her a treat in the crate, then "okay to release her. It can help to give her something to do, like a little sniffy mat or a quick play, to burn off the last of the buzz.

You don't have to be strict about all of this — she'll just want to say hi and will calm down on her own. I'm just trying to make "calm greeting" her default over time. Do whatever works for you.

Sleep & the Crate

We don't use the crate heavily for naps anymore as she mostly self-settles fine. But it's a genuinely useful tool if she's had a tough walk or a big feelings kind of day.

Decompression crate time

1. Say "in your crate" and point at it, and she'll go in. Give her a treat, close the door, and pull the cover down so she's fully covered.
2. Say "okay, nap time" (or whatever feels natural). If you can, sitting on the bed next to her for a little bit, just on your phone, whatever. She settles faster when she can sense you're nearby rather than having immediately gone off to do something (but she can usually cope with that fine too).
3. Wait for sounds of the big sigh and lie-down. Once you hear that, that should be her out for a while!

Waking up

If she starts rustling, she might go back to sleep so give it a minute. If she's clearly not settling back down, I usually lift the cover first but leave the door closed for a moment so she can transition back slowly while i'm pottering around. Then open it and she'll wait for your "okay" before coming out. If she tries to rush out as the door opens, just close it over again. She knows.

Quirks & Good-to-Knows

Words She Knows